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Student Essays

A Strong Willed Woman: A Biography of Samira Rustami

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A Strong Willed Woman: A Biography of Samira Rustami

By Uma (a pseudo name)

March 2023

Samira at Chatham University

  Samira Rustami was born on October 16, 2001, in Kabul, Afghanistan. She lived her life under strict societal norms, widespread gender discrimination, and outright inequality. Despite those challenges, she finished school with excellent grades and completed her university degree. She fled Afghanistan due to the Taliban’s takeover and made it to the American land of freedom. Currently, she is working on her nursing degree.

Samira has five sisters, one brother, six aunts, two uncles, and many cousins. Because she had a big family, she spent her childhood mostly with her relatives without socializing with anyone outside her family. She had a disadvantaged position in society due to her gender and poor caste. In a country like Afghanistan, from the time a girl is born, society pressures them to give up on their dreams. “Repeatedly, I was reminded that I should not pick up a book or a pen. I just need to learn how to cook and clean to serve the family,” said Samira in an interview. If her parents found out that she secretly studied, they would tear her books or burn them. That was very different from the way her brother was raised. He was always showered with encouragement. She would often find herself wanting to be a boy instead.

In 2005, Samira went to school at the age of five. She was a top student in her class, and by twelve she was done with school. She loved her teachers, who inspired girls to get an education. After her graduation from high school, she received a scholarship to attend university because she had a high score in her entrance test. 

In 2016, Samira read the book Malala Yousufzai[1], which inspired her. She applied to a university in India, and a year later she started to attend the university at the age of 16. Her uncle helped her financially, which brought her closer towards her dream. She studied there for three years and got her Bachelor’s of Business Administration in Finance. This was a remarkable achievement because, according to UNESCO’s data on Afghanistan, the literacy rate for women aged 15-24 in 2018 was 62%, and the gross enrollment ratio for females in tertiary education was 16% in 2019. Samira was persistent in pursuing higher education because she understood its value. To her, it meant freedom and independence.

In 2021, she got back to Afghanistan with the hope to find a job in the finance industry. Despite working hard to achieve her goals, never giving up, and continuing to search for opportunities, her gender continued to deter her employment options. Finally, she found a job at a five-star hotel. She worked there for seven months, but due to the Taliban’s takeover in Afghanistan in August 2021, she realized that she had to take a frightening risk and leave behind her whole life, achievements, and family members, who she might never see again. Samira and her husband left the country with a small backpack. She still cannot put into words her feelings about that day.

The population of Afghanistan is 40 million people, and by December 2021, approximately 8% of the population had been displaced. Samira and her husband got lucky, and they made it to the United States in August 2021. Despite ongoing challenges, the United States gave her another chance to improve her education career and pursue another bachelor’s degree under a partially funded scholarship at Chatham University.

Samira, who turned 22 years in October 2022 is taking classes at Chatham University and wants to become a nurse to help people. She has an adorable daughter and caring husband. Even though she had an extremely hard life in her childhood, she does not regret that. Furthermore, she hopes her story will inspire other young Afghan girls and encourage them to believe that they can achieve their goal too. Samira has a strong will, and nothing will stop her from achieving more.

  1. Malala Yosufzai: a writer who lived in a similar culture, who overcame every challenge and became famous
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Habib Sorosh: A Biography

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By Mohammad Omar Ahmadi

March 2023

Habib reading his essay at Chatham University

Habibullah Sorosh is a professor, screenwriter, and playwright whose research includes the history of Afghan cinema, the structural effects of absurdist dramas, and Kazakh historical films. Born in the Jaghori district, Ghazni province of Afghanistan, Habibullah received his Bachelor of Cinema and Theater from the Department of Fine Arts at Kabul University and Master of Art Criticism at Kazakh National Academy of Arts Temorbek Zhurgenov. For the past ten years, Habibullah has been a professor at Kabul University in the Department of Fine Arts and Dramatic Literature. He is currently a Visiting Researcher in the Schools of Drama and Art at Carnegie Mellon University.

Born as Habibullah on October 28, 1985, in a relatively poor family, Habib is the 5th child of Juma Khan and Hakima. Juma Khan was a hard working farmer focusing on growing wheat, the most important crop in Afghanistan, followed by rice, barley, and cotton. Hakima was a housewife who did household jobs and raised their children. She also helped Juma Khan with farming, which is common for Afghan women living in rural villages. Juma Khan was a kind person known for his honesty within his community. He was like a friend to Habib and his siblings. Hakima was a smart woman, and she was always a good adviser in Habib’s life.

Habib has four living brothers (Rohullah, Mohammad Sharif, Mohammad Zarif and Mirza Hussain) and two living sisters (Jamila and Najiba). His oldest brother named Mohammad Asif was lost on his way to Iran in 2010, and still no one knows what happened to him, but after these many years, Habib and his family have accepted that he may have died. Another older brother Rahmatullah got Hepatitis, which damaged his liver, and died in 2012. Mohammad Asif had a Bachelor of Philosophy and Rahmatullah had studied up to 6th grade of high school. His living brothers Rohullah and Mohammad Sharif studied up to 8th grade of high school. Mohammad Zarif is a dentist, and his younger brother Mirza Hussain has a Bachelor in Dramatic Literature. His older sister Jamila only finished primary school. However, his younger sister Najiba has a Bachelor in Cinema.

Growing in a small village named Shahrzaida, a historical place, in Jaghori district, Habib attended Abu Raihan al Beroni public school from 1992 to 2004. During all those years, Habib was a smart student who always got the first place in class. The most influential person in his life was his teacher named Afzali who was a kind and humble person. He was Habib’s first grade teacher who not only educated him, but also helped him to find his educational path. He got cancer and died in 2019.

One most memorable experience of Habib’s life during high school is when he was in the 11th grade. One of his classmates had four members of his family as teachers who helped him to cheat and take the first place in class. Habib, therefore, got the second place in class. Habib complained to the administration of the school, and after taking the exams given by school committee members, he achieved his first place in class again. This incident made Habib very sad. He felt his family’s financial situation affected his education. By giving bribes and having family relationships with the teachers, someone took his position in the class. However, he wanted to show everyone that they couldn’t take his intelligence from him. His self-confidence and hope for a better tomorrow motivated him to stand against this inequity.

After high school, Habib attended Kabul University, and after four years (2006-2009), he earned his Bachelor’s degree in Theater and Cinema. In 2012, he started his Master of Art Criticism Science program with a specialty in Film Studies in the Kazakh National Academy of Art named after Temorbek Zhorgenov in Kazakhstan and finished his degree in 2015.

After his master’s studies, in 2015, Habib married Adila, who was a midwife, in Kabul, Afghanistan. They have two sons (Sami and Nima), Sami was born on August 16th, 2016, and Nima was born on April 2nd, 2020.

During his career, Habib had a lot of cultural and social activities in Afghanistan. In 2015, he was selected many times as a member of a judge panel in film, theater, and dramatic literature in national and international festivals. In 2017, he achieved the award for the best playwright among a large number of nominees from different countries for his drama about Maulana Jalaluddin Mohammad Balkhi (Rumi) in an international festival in India. Habib has also authored two books named “Characterization in Drama” in 2017 and “Criticism of Dramatic Literature” in 2019. He has also written and published several scientific articles for national and international journals during these years. 

Unfortunately, in 2021, the Taliban took over Kabul and Afghanistan, which forced him to leave the country because the Taliban has a very hostile relationship with art and artists in Afghanistan. He was a taboo artist in their eyes. Furthermore, he has written and directed many plays and screenplays about the Taliban, al-Qaeda, sheikhs, ISIS, and warlords of the region, all of whom wanted an opportunity to exact revenge on him. He has shown many plays at the Afghan National Festival and at international festivals. He has written a play called “The Unsung Song of the Village,” in which his sister (Najiba Sorosh) played the central role. This performance seriously criticized and ridiculed the views and ideology of the Taliban, ISIS, al-Qaeda, sheikhs, and warlords. This performance and his plays were widely reported in the media, such as the BBC and other  news sites. As a result, he was threatened with death by the Taliban, who attempted to arrest him and his sister several times but were unsuccessful.

Finally, when the Taliban started house-to-house searches in Kabul, Afghanistan, he and his family (his wife and his two sons) had to flee to Pakistan, and then they came to the United States of America with the cooperation of the organization Scholars at Risk. He is currently a Visiting Researcher in the Schools of Drama and Art at Carnegie Mellon University, where he is researching the fields of theater, cinema, and art theory.

Reflection, Student Essays, Student experience

Appreciating my Home Country Through Studying Abroad

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By Honoka Ihara

English Language Program

Chatham University

I was in elementary school when I decided to go to the United States to study. The trigger was a trivial thing. I listened to foreign songs and watched foreign movies, and I simply wanted to be able to speak English. I also longed to live in the U.S., which is very different from Japan. From there I began to study English. I asked my parents to go to an English cram school.

I also attended the English Department in high school and enrolled in the English Literature Department at university. My plan was to study abroad during my second year of college. However, in 2020, the year I entered college, the Covid pandemic happened. My college life became completely different from what I had imagined. My first year of college, I never went to college and took all of my classes online. My college had many foreign professors, and I looked forward to taking their classes. I wanted to chat with them in English after class. However, taking classes online meant no interaction with the professors. Furthermore, international students who would have come to Japan every year were no longer able to come to Japan to study due to Covid-19. My college had a “conversation partner” program, and I had been looking forward to participating in such programs, but I was no longer able to do so. I have two older sisters and when they were in college, they really seemed to enjoy it. Knowing that, I was really disappointed compared to my own college life. Despite this, I prepared myself from the first year so that I could go study abroad in my second year. After passing the internal selection process, I was selected to study abroad in the academic year 2021. However, as it turned out, the study abroad program for the year 2021 was also cancelled. 2021 was still in the midst of the Corona epidemic, and I was only able to go to about half of the colleges, so I was prepared for the possibility that the program would be cancelled, but I was still shocked. In 2022, after one more year, I was able to study at Chatham University.

In Japan, I was not able to do things that are typical of university students, but since coming to the U.S., I have experienced many different things. There were also many things that I did not notice when I was in Japan. What struck me most was that Americans are not afraid to leave or throw away food. In Japan, leaving food behind is not considered a good thing. Of course, it may not be considered a good thing in the US either. However, while eating dinner in a dining hall, I noticed that many Americans leave the pizza crust behind. Some people leave other things that they just had a bite of.  Seeing this happen, I once thought to myself, “They must have left it because it didn’t suit their palates.” The extreme case is there is a trash can in the area where we return the dirty dishes. That trash can is divided into two types: one for paper napkins and other trash, and the other for throwing away leftover food. I was surprised when I saw that for the first time because I had never seen trash cans in Japan for throwing away leftover food scraps. I heard that the leftovers are used as animal feed, and I was surprised that the trash cans were built on the premise that leftovers would be thrown out. In Japan, there are probably people who have no objection to leaving food behind, but most people are taught by their parents or teachers not to leave food behind as much as possible. So many Japanese people are resistant to leaving food behind. I think this is a good thing about Japan that I noticed when I came to America.

Thus, since coming to the U.S., I have had many opportunities to learn about the good qualities of Japan. Before studying abroad, I did not expect to think about my home country because I thought I would discover many things about the United States. However, I thought that it is because I live in a different country from my home country that I notice the good things about my home country. Conversely, before I came here, I had an image of America as being very beautiful and everything was wonderful compared to Japan. I think that coming to the U.S. has broadened my perspective in many ways. From this perspective, I would like to identify good and bad points and use them as material to improve myself. For me, studying abroad is not only about learning English, but also about myself. I want to apply what I have realized through studying abroad to my future life.

Reflection, Student Essays, Student experience

Hard Choices

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By Rashed Alolayani

English Language Program

Fall 2022

One a cold cloudy day, I woke up at 7:00 am. I typically begin my day by making a cup of coffee so I can stay focused throughout the day. As I I was eating breakfast that day, I thought of my early days in the United States. I was browsing my photo album on my phone and saw pictures that I took in the first semester. I recalled how cold it was in the winter and how much snow was on the trees and the ground. That morning, I reflected on how much fun I had and how many obstacles I overcame. After getting dressed, I went for my usual morning walks. I was enthusiastic and happy that day.

However, when the day was over, I got anxious, and I got the feeling that every foreign person in a foreign country felt. Long story short, I got homesick and had been missing my family and friends. I enjoy communicating with them on the phone, but what I missed is hanging out with them and being around them. I remember that night I went on my computer and searched for my home on Google Earth so I can feel that I’m there. The feeling of separation from people and places that we know is a common feeling among international students. I usually deal with those emotions by talking to friends, writing a journal, or making art so I can flip the switch on anxiety.

Still, I felt different that night. I felt anxious and stressed. “Am I wasting my own time?”  “Am I good enough?” “What should I do in the future?” “Am I going to make the right decision or not?” Those were the thoughts running through my head. I was overthinking over many tough decisions that needed to be dealt with. It was a critical choice that would shape my self-development and experiences and could change my whole identity in the future. Therefore, I had to choose,  and I had to choose wisely. Life is short, and it is characterized by struggles, unfairness, and daily battles. Nevertheless, we need to try to concentrate on what makes us happy, what makes us grateful, and what motivates us. Making decisions will always be challenging because assessing options requires time and effort. Second-guessing myself and feeling uncertain are the usual phases of this process. In many ways, it is a good thing to be considering my options rather than simply going with the flow.

I was thinking about continuing my academic journey and pursuing a master’s degree in my field. It is going to be a long journey that requires a portion of work, self-discipline, and more hard work. I had a conversation with a dear friend of mine that night, and I talked about everything I had in my mind. My friend said, “Don’t worry about a thing ’cause every little thing is going to be all right.” It was a quote from a song that we used to listen to back in the day. After I hung up, I felt a big relief with a smile on my face. Later that week, I applied for a Master of Arts in psychology. I decided that it was the right choice to make. If I get accepted, I will learn new knowledge and get the best grades I could. If not, I would go on a nice vacation and a new journey.

In the present time and as a full-time student here in the United States, I feel that I have the opportunity to explore new cultures, new places, and new ideas. Furthermore, I feel that my perspective has changed in the way I see things. I’ve become more rational, patient, and independent. Moreover, I’ve developed and learned new skills in English like speaking and listening to people, and reading and writing, and those skills will assist me in my future job or simple communication. After my experience in Chatham, I only have gratitude for everyone there. I have wonderful teachers who have helped me gain a better understanding of both American culture and the English language. They have provided significant knowledge about spoken and written communication to assist me in being a booming postgraduate student. I appreciate the college staff who welcomed me with open arms, and the classmates from around the world who are kind and cool.

To conclude, making decisions will always be difficult because trying to weigh options takes time. However, life is fleeting, and individuals should focus on what makes them happy, grateful, and motivated. Therefore, when the time comes for making a choice, we will have the mindset to make the right decision.

International students, Student Essays, Student experience

Big Decisions in Life

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Rena Yamashita

English Language Program

Fall 2022

There are numerous people in the world today who can speak English. As I do not excel in anything, I was afraid that I would have trouble finding a job in the future if I could only speak English to some extent. I was leading a mediocre university life, but I decided that if the university was recruiting international students, I would do something I might never experience again in my life, and it would give me a chance to rethink my thinking and way of life. There are two main reasons for studying abroad. The first is to improve my English skills. Second is to experience various things and develop myself. There are still many things I don’t understand at all, but I hope that by the time I return to Japan, I will have grown as much as possible.

Do you think English will be useful in the future? I began to think that my English skills were not good enough around the first year of junior high school. When I became a junior high school student and had to communicate in English, I felt very miserable because I could not speak fluently. The reason why I feel so bad is because I had lived in Hong Kong and had daily conversations in English, but when I came back to Japan, I had no opportunities to speak English and my English skills quickly deteriorated and I could no longer speak it. Unlike other subjects, I studied English without giving up because I thought that studying a lot of vocabulary and grammar now would help me in the future. Until I entered college, I thought that if I studied English in college, I would surely be able to speak it fluently. However, I realized that the opposite was true and that I would have to work hard and study hard to speak English. There I decided that the only way to improve my English was to study abroad in the United States. I hoped to improve it and work in a trade-related field where I can communicate with foreign countries in the future.

Unlike in Japan, students are more aggressive and to do anything eagerly in the US. Since I was a child, I was influenced by other people’s opinions, and I did not express my own opinions and had no will of my own. When I was a freshman in college, I took a Global Study class, and Professor Gakiya’s words stuck with me. She had previously taught at an American university and was able to give us some specifics about the level of student participation and how advanced the education was at that time. In fact, most American students speak up and learn by themselves. Hearing that story, I felt miserable and wanted to go to the U.S. to take classes and gain that positive attitude. It has been about three months since I came to the U.S., and as I took classes with people from various countries, I felt firsthand that their positive attitude is different from that of Japanese students. I feel I have been growing by being stimulated every day. In addition to classes, I interact with local people by participating in events held by the university, which is also a good stimulus for me. For example, local students who are studying Japanese and we Japanese students have a chance to meet and talk with each other once a week. I am very grateful for this opportunity to learn about the U.S., and it is also a great way to study English. You can also travel around the U.S. to observe the national character and visit tourist attractions to experience other cultures. I believe that by interacting with many local people in this way and experiencing things that cannot be experienced in Japan, one can grow unknowingly.

I realize the only way to develop myself is to keep trying new things, but I am often disappointed by my lack of self-confidence. However, when I think back on the reasons for my decision to study abroad, I can see that I should not dwell on it and that I need to be more proactive and active. The important underlying question for me is: Why did I come to the U.S. to study? It was the negative thoughts inside me that keep saying the he wrong thing and make me feel embarrassed, and I worry about what other people think of me. I would like to adopt a more positive way of thinking. I also want to improve my English skills and become a person who can play an active role overseas. How much can I grow during this short period of studying abroad and how much time can I spend in a productive and fulfilling way? In my mind, studying abroad is one of the major decisions of my life, so I hope to spend each day of this important time without wasting it, and to grow as a person.

International students, Student Essays, Student experience

Reflection on my Study Abroad Experience in the US

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Nodirjon Kobulov

English Language Program

Fall 2022

Next week will be exactly 4 months since I arrived in the United States. If you ask me why I wanted to study abroad and  why I chose the United States of America and why I left Cambridge International University, which is one of the best schools in Uzbekistan, I will without hesitation say the past 4 months has been a huge step towards success in my life and studying abroad has been a great learning experience for me.

As many say, studying abroad gives a person great skills. It is no exaggeration to say that I have found out what I am capable of and found my identity in America. I have learned to be grateful and take advantage of every opportunity that is given to me. I have realized that learning from world-class and experienced teachers from different countries can have a special effect on a person. Studying abroad has allowed me to learn about the culture of not only my current country but also different countries. I met new friends and it has helped me to achieve everything I dreamed of.

Despite the fact that I have lived in America for just 4 months, I have gradually got used to this atmosphere. I know it wasn’t easy and it’s still not easy. There are times when I have to get up early to go to school, wait for the bus on cold days, and run as fast as I could to avoid missing the bus. However, I can clearly say that all these events have made me me happier and more resilient. I believe that if I were in my own country, it would be very difficult for me to find such happiness or success despite difficulties. I have learned to inspire and motivate myself from every detail and from every place.

In my free time I enjoy learning more about America, exploring historic buildings and history. I enjoy watching deer come to my yard and try to get as close to them as I could, but I never could. I especially love watching the breathtaking sight of airplanes buzzing in the air when the weather is clear. I improve my knowledge of English by talking to people, and I get the information I do not know by talking to people. I have been trying to take advantage of the facilities that have been given to me as much as I can.

I couldn’t imagine when my friends who studied abroad told me that they made so many friends. At that time, I made a promise, ” I will definitely learn and make educated friends abroad. ”  When I summed up my 4 months in America, the number of my friends increased significantly. I am currently making friends from countries such as America, Korea, Japan, China, Afghanistan, Colombia, Costa Rica, Russia, Ukraine, Turkey, Egypt, Lebanon, Kazakhstan, Tajikistan. I am learning about different countries, cultures and values. Most importantly, after talking with them, I feel that there was a great growth in myself through their fluid thinking and good relationships with people. Especially when I listen to lectures about American culture and literature by highly experienced teachers during my ELP classes, I am proud that I get a lot of information about America and get to know more every day.

Currently, I am in the United States and through all the experiences and knowledge I have gained. I have learned that every step I take to see everything around me helps me to understand what original beauty means. New opportunities are opening up for me, and I have a different world view. Studying abroad has opened my eyes. Life is not as easy as we think, but I am happy to make the most of these opportunities given to me and work for the future believing that everything will be fine. If asked for advice on studying, I would tell everyone to come and study here so that they can enjoy such happiness. I am sure that studying abroad is very useful and worthwhile, and believe me, all the knowledge and experience you gain from such an atmosphere will serve you well for the rest of your life.

International students, Reflection, Student experience

A Dream of a Better Tomorrow

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By Mohammad Omar Ahmadi

English Language Program

Fall 2022

It was August 15, 2021.  Everything seemed normal in the morning, but things suddenly changed later in the day. I went to my work like I was doing every other day in the morning. Everyone was talking about the news Afghanistan’s president fled. In the past few months, the government situation was uncertain because every day we witnessed fallen cities to the Taliban. Only Kabul, the capital of Afghanistan,  and a few other cities near Kabul were governed by the previous government. Then in the afternoon, we head of the Taliban’s entrance to Kabul. My father was working with a U.S. media company in Kabul, which finally succeeded in helping us leave Afghanistan after many attempts. It was hard to leave Afghanistan physically and mentally.

Education was always a priority in my life. After graduating from high school and earning an associate degree in technology, both my homeland’s history and the ongoing political conflicts in Afghanistan motivated me to pursue my higher education in International Relations and Diplomacy. As a young Afghan, I always dreamed of being able to one day, as a seed for a new Afghanistan, open the door to peace in the midst of war and terrorism by choosing to pursue my education. It was a dream that I, and a thousand of my classmates, had for Afghanistan. It was not just a dream, we believed that one day it would happen, and our homeland would move towards the light of peace and prosperity. But all of a sudden, it got dark. On the 15th of August 2021, everything collapsed, despite the entire twenty-year journey of fighting against the Taliban. My family and I had to emigrate for our lives.

After defending my monograph online from the United States, my four-year study of international relations and diplomacy came to an end, and I graduated from university in exile. It was a strange state of joy and pain. Like any other human being, I was happy that I finished my bachelor’s degree and was gradually coming closer to my dreams, but it was painful that the ideal I had envisioned for my homeland no longer existed. I had my diploma in hand, but I had lost my homeland.

The four-year journey to receive my bachelor’s degree was not easy for me. Even as a young child in the family, I always had a responsibility to financially contribute to the family in addition to my studies. Therefore, while continuing my college education, I started working with a telecommunications company in Afghanistan. I worked with this company daily from morning to afternoon for a small salary, and I went to university in the evening after work. This was how my entire four-year journey went. I remember the nights that I was awake until late at night to attend to my studies and then got up early in the morning to go to work in order to support my family. It was a difficult time, but the dream of a better tomorrow was the motivation that kept me moving and working hard to complete my education.

I always tried to find good educational opportunities for my future. Even when I was in Afghanistan, I dreamed of being among the graduates of the Fulbright Scholarship, and I was always striving to qualify for an international scholarship to pursue a master’s degree abroad. I have come to understand that Afghanistan needs more people with sufficient knowledge of the world and the realities of our country. Our homeland is far from being the caravan of progress and development in the world, and the main reason for this distance is the illiteracy of a large number of Afghans. I considered it my responsibility in Afghanistan to study and be as literate as possible.

When we immigrated, all my dreams for Afghanistan were gradually becoming memories. During my first months in the United States, I had the impression that living in an immigrant land consisted of only constantly working just to keep the family alive. The situation in my homeland took away all my hopes for the future since it was hard to believe that one day it would change again. The hopes for Afghanistan’s future are diminishing day by day. But my concerns for the future of Afghanistan are still present, and with each day they grow more.  I have decided to continue my path and chose Afghanistan’s future. Whatever happens, I still hope and believe in a better tomorrow for my homeland, so I will continue my education. As a former student of international relations, I have learned that regimes like the Taliban that impose themselves on nations will not last long. From my understanding of the contemporary history of Afghanistan, it is clear to me that these times in history are passing, and people will one day decide their own destinies again. With this belief, I have decided to continue my education to change my own destiny.

Reflection, Student Essays, Student experience

Best Study Abroad Experience of My Life

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By Rena Kondo

English Language Program

Fall 2022

Studying abroad has changed my personality. Before I came to Chatham University, I was neither talkative nor optimistic. I am a shy person and worry about anything. For example, I am waiting just for someone to talk to me while I want to talk to them. Also, I am not a risk taker so if I see a risk of making a mistake, I wait and delay my action every time. I am still nervous, but I am trying to challenge myself more than before. I’ve decided never to think I have more time to do something in the future. If I did not act, I could not do it forever. So I acted. I said “Hi” to international students , and we’ve become closer to each other. I joined an activity outside of Chatham University to explore my experience. I made friends from more than 10 foreign countries. I want to tell my past self, “You will have many more  friends than you expected.” I learned there is no difference between friends even when we are from different countries. We can be friends and spend our time in the same way as with friends from the same country.

Moreover, my friends have helped me to be more positive. One international friend who I met here shared her experience that changed my thoughts. When she came here, she spoke English without confidence. She worried about her English ability when talking to American people. One day, she talked to a friend who lives in the United States. She said, “My English is not good, I’m sorry” before starting the conversation. Her American friend said to her “You mustn’t say my English is not good. You know more than two languages., It’s amazing.”  When I heard this experience, I also thought I was good at speaking in English, but I could try to talk and improve my confidence. My friend was also in the same situation, but she could overcome her shyness.  Now, I am going to go to the next step like she did.

Personally, this is the second time I’ve studied abroad.  However, the first time was not what I wanted because of Covid-19. My previous plan was staying in Australia for 9 months, but after only 1 month, I stopped the program and returned home. For studying abroad, I took TOEFL more than 20 times. If I could not get a high score, I could not study abroad. To get a good TOEFL score, I dedicated much time. When I was going to return to Japan, I could not believe it and kept asking myself, “Why did I lose all of the opportunities while not doing anything bad? Why?” I was waiting for my next studying abroad experience. I was not just waiting without doing anything. I took English classes and tried IELTS and TOEIC. Also, I tried TOEFL again from the beginning. It was the hardest part because I only had one chance. Failure was not an option.

I went through every wall, and I could finally get the opportunity of studying abroad. It was time to choose country, but I did not want to go to the United States because of my fear of guns. However, since the United States opened its border, so I chose the United States reluctantly.  Before I came here, I worried about safety and security. However, when I met the staff from the Office of International Affairs, I started to like American people and the city. A few days later, I met Chatham staff and students, they said to me, “Welcome to Chatham!” My image of the United States completely changed with a 180-degree turn. Now, I can say the reason why my first study abroad stopped in the middle was for me to get here, the United States, with a positive mind.

Everything is happy for me here. It is not only traveling to another state with my friends but also some difficulties I face and overcome. I first must study English, do homework and exams as well as do laundry, go to grocery store, and manage myself without my parents’ help. Sometimes I cannot sleep well during the week, and it is extremely exhausting. I do not know why, but I still feel fulfilled. I can say being busy is happiness.

I have now realized that my choice was not wrong. If someone does something before me, it does not mean I’m behind them. Thanks to Covid-19, I now have an experience of studying abroad in the US and  confidence to pass the TOEFL exam for the second attempt. In fact, I postponed graduating from my university by 2 years. My friends of the same age already started to work more than 2 years ago. Some friends studied abroad and have graduated as usual. During the days, I was thinking why these bad things happened only to me. However, if I had given up a second chance of studying abroad, I might regret it and blame it for not challenging myself. I learned that I must do what I want now without comparing myself with someone else.

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Reward Yourself

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Marwa Rahim

By Marwa Rahim

English Language Program

Fall 2022

I grew up as a normal child in my home country. I had a good childhood. While sometimes it was difficult, I just did not care because I was just a child who did not know the good and the bad in the world yet. As a child I was certain about one thing in my life: I would not have a normal life just like other people in my hometown. My  mother’s work always encouraged as she was an activist and a teacher in our province, and she had a significant role in our community and family education. So, I decided by myself at a noticeably early age of 11 or 12 that I would make a change, even a ridiculously small change, on my life one other person. I dreamed of becoming a doctor, which remained my one and only childhood dream, and wanted to have a doctor’s office and save as many lives as I could because of our country’s situation.  I remember that whenever we played games with my childhood friends, I always had a doctor’s role and help my friends,

I had lots of activities during my high school. I played a significant role in every event in school, and I was the presenter for all those events, even for our graduation party. I prepared a topic for all my classmates. I had interviews with our local radio and TV shows for women and children’s rights. Despite all of the difficulties in my home city in northern Afghanistan, I graduated from high school. However, there was no medical school and few opportunities to chase my goals, so I decided, or may I say my parents decided, that it would be better for me to move to another city. So I moved to a bigger city named Balkh and my medical school journey started.

I was the happiest person on earth at that time and my medical school was the best school for me, and everything was surprisingly good for me because I had the chance to study medicine, which was also a dream for all my classmates. On the first day of my medical school, our professor asked us about our plans, so I spoke louder and talked more about my plans and dreams. I said that after I graduated from the medical school, I would like to become a cardiologist and a heart surgeon because I never saw a woman surgeon in my province and to help women and children in my home country.

In 2021, I started my 7th semester of medical school. I said to myself that I did it, I passed half of the way of my journey, and I was close to achieving my dreams. Unfortunately, the situation in my country did not allow me to continue that dream anymore. I had to leave to be safe and have a future for us, for our families, and our children. During that time, I lost everything except my dreams. I came to the U.S. with only one backpack, but as I know myself, I am not that person to give up easily.  I promised to myself that I would make a change to women’s life in my country and I would be their voice and fight for women’s rights. Obviously I am thinking that I am becoming a feminist day by day.

I came to the US, and I tried to work hard and achieve what I wanted to be and my goals. Currently I am taking English academic classes at Chatham university at Pittsburgh PA, millions, and millions miles from my home country and hometown. There are many things that I am grateful for in my life since I came to the USA. I met people from all over the world with a different languages and appearances, and it was surprising to me first. I  never met people from another countries like Japan in my home country. My goals are to finish the English academic classes and apply to one of the medical school pathways for medical universities in USA.

Life hasn’t been essay  for me. I know everyone is struggling with a lot in their lives right now and it is hard to start your life from zero and left everything behind. It takes time, so we all should be patient and continue to work hard. Everyone has their own dreams and thoughts. We should never stop being who we are and what we want to be, and in the end we are all humans who work together for this land that has become home for all of us.

Student Essays

Just One Day

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By Habibullah Sorosh

English Language Program

Fall 2022

He has messy hair and a long beard, big eyes, and an angry face. He points his gun at me. He wants to shoot me, and he shouts loudly in Pashto, “Are you Habib Sorosh?” I deny it. He slaps me hard on the face, I’m shaking with fear, and he points his gun at me again and says, in a loud voice, “Say I’m Habib Sorosh.” My hands are shaking. I want to scream. He puts his hand on my mouth. It prevents me from screaming. I’m suffocating, gasping for breath, and with effort I can remove his rough hands from my mouth. He screams for the third time, “You have become an infidel, and you deserve to die.” He aims his gun at me and fires. I wake up screaming. My wife asks me, “Did you have the nightmare of the Taliban again?” I laugh, and I shake my head in agreement. She smiles at me and closes her eyes again.

I wipe the sweat from my brow and chin. I am looking at the clock. It is five o’clock in the morning. I want to write and turn on my laptop. I stare at the folder labeled “Policy Course on Playwriting.” Beautiful and unforgettable memories of Kabul University are imprinted in my mind. What a glorious name, “Kabul University,” which used to draw the biggest dreams for me. With a hungry stomach and the smallest facilities, I was flying in the imaginary sky in sync with the dreams. What plans and maps I drew for my future! What hardships, inequalities, discrimination, and bigotry I had experienced to reach the position of professor at Kabul University. Overcoming these problems increased the value of being a professor, and I vowed to fight decisively against the monsters of bigotry, jealousy, ethnocentrism, gender inequality, and ignorance.

I believe that Afghans’ fate is linked to homelessness, displacement, and emigration. Look at how quickly and unexpectedly the storm of events destroys and disintegrates the loving center of Afghan families and takes them away from the best supports of their existence. Moments of living together, laughing, serenity, and intimacy fade into memory, giving way to dreams, nostalgia, complications, and, finally, excruciating pain. Afghans, wherever they are, miss those who can’t be wanted and those who can’t be had. They can only miss them and long to meet them. Afghans may have brought their bodies to New York, Berlin, Paris, Sydney, and Tehran, but their souls are still full of smoke and gunpowder in the back alleys of Kabul, and their ears are still filled with screams and moans. Wherever Afghans go, they worry about the city where they have created memories for years and are waiting for the political situation of their country to improve. I miss Kabul University and my classroom. I miss playwriting lessons. I miss story writing and reading, and I miss discussions in the classroom with the extent of this strange city’s nostalgia.

I pick up my phone and call my friend, who was my colleague at Kabul University and now lives in Germany. He misses the university and feels homeless, but he expects the country’s political situation to improve. He sighs and says, “Damn me for leaving Afghanistan.” I tell him, “If you had stayed in Afghanistan, maybe the Taliban would have killed you.” He answers with a disappointed and a slowly rising tone, “The Taliban killed me once. Now the moments of waiting will gradually kill me.” I understand that the person waiting is always protesting. In the nights, the stars burn with pain, the clouds cry, the leaves tremble with fear, and the person waits for dawn with silent cries. My friend asks, “How are you living in America?” I tell him, “I am living contrary to my imagination.” He laughs and continues, “I don’t understand what you mean.” I explain to him that I used to think that it was very difficult to learn a language, study, work, and live abroad, but when I entered the United States of America, I was able to learn the language, work, research, and learn easily. The culture, mutual respect, humanity, sincerity, and honesty of these people teach me about humanity. He interrupts me again and says, “Germany is a beautiful place with kind people. I became fascinated by the culture of these people.” He laughs again and says, “But nowhere will we forget our own country, where we made lifelong memories.” We say goodbye together, and I check my Facebook and see that many of my friends have reported the explosion at the Kaj educational center in the Dasht Barchi area of Kabul. My hands are trembling. I try to look at the pictures of the dead and injured, but I can’t. A strange feeling has occurred to me, as if my existence is witnessing a bad event, as if I believe I am among the dead and injured and searching for one of my family members.

My phone rings, and I answer. It is my brother. Without greeting, I ask him, “What’s up? Did something happen to the family?” He answers in a broken tone, “Yes, Rahila, the daughter of our uncle, has been killed.” I can’t talk. I hang up my phone. I cry, and I curse the perpetrators of these suicide attacks who took our best friends and family away from us in these two decades. Rahila was the eldest child of a poor family of eight people. Her father is sick, and he has a disabled son at home who cannot afford to be treated. Her unfortunate mother does all the housework, from farming to cooking and providing food. Rahila’s mother bore all the hardships of the time alone with farming. She paid for Rahila’s course fee so that she could study for the university entrance exam and become a doctor and treat her brother. Regrettably, Rahila took her mother’s precious efforts and her dreams to the grave with her. The wishes of Rahila’s mother and Rahila’s wishes are sleeping forever in the heart of the cold soil. Her death is a painful wound that will never heal, and it is sucking the bone marrow of Rahila’s mother and father until they die. Rahila and her dreams burned down in one moment at Kaj Educational Center. What I’m writing isn’t a script, a dream, or an illusion. It’s real, a reality that defies human imagination, a reality that concepts are unable to express and the camera is ashamed to depict. The camera’s eyes are too innocent to bear and see this moral disaster and human sin, and by writing, I am also betraying the victims of this disaster. What is happening here (Dasht Barchi) cannot be “written.” My tears don’t allow me to write, and I whisper under my breath, “This is the fate of a Hazara family that pays a high price for knowledge.”

As a member of Rahila’s family, I mourn her absence. I am ashamed that Afghan girls see and endure so much abuse, humiliation, and insults from the patriarchal society of Afghanistan. One of these victims of violence and deprivation was Rahila, who had risen from the storm of war and gender inequality. Her education and knowledge were her love, a love that cost her dearly. She has been resting peacefully in the village cemetery.